I had never painted a self-portrait before.
 
It is true that the idea had appeared in my mind, for the first time, over the last two years. Many things happened to me on a personal level that I gradually reflected in the new paintings, but I still lacked that last 'birth'. I wanted to do it, but in the long list of images I needed to get out of my head, I was always relegated to that dangerous position in which we all leave things: "as soon as I manage to finish all this, it will be the next thing".
 
'All this' never ends. Life never freezes so that you have time to do the unfinished things. It just constantly brings new ones.
 
But, after living several cathartic artistic experiences during the first half of 2024, I felt it was time to do it and that I couldn't delay any longer. I also felt that I was fully prepared.
 
I thought it would be easy. But this self-portrait was not easy at all, I confess. I had to give it a lot of thought until I finally gave in to its own autonomy.
 
If you look at my work, light backgrounds are usually the protagonists. In the case of this self-portrait, the darkness wanted to emerge. It's as if, somehow, I live in it, and through painting I manage to create the luminous worlds that I lack. But of course, by portraying me... there it is. However, there are also the caterpillars, a life form prior to the chrysalis that will give rise to a fully transformed being. 
 
This self-portrait number 1 shows me that I have only just begun the journey. 
 
Oil on wood panel.
65x54 cm.
August 2024
 
This painting arrives with a certificate of authenticity signed by the artist.
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